The Awkward Author

Every morning I'm on line, taking advantage of the various social media for promoting. I, like countless other authors, diligently face each new day with the tiny light of hope that maybe today, we will hit on just the right person or group, to catapult us to the next level. Like very tiny fish in a vast sea of pens, paper and countless dreams, we push forward.

The game of marketing is truly not for the faint of heart or weakened soul. It comes at you like a bullet train, making no stops in its never ending journey of mountains and treacherous roads. A day with silence is equal to a ten day set back. Out of sight, is in this game ... completely out of mind. You must make a connection each and every day. That's it, no other alternative.

Presenting yourself with dignity, while all the time becoming a bullet train of your own, is the balancing act that leaves you with one foot on the beam and your arms flailing while your body struggles not to fall. It's a fine line between contact and pounding your books into someones head. You must sprinkle your work onto a mountain of whip cream and cherries, so they don't grow tired of your repetitive plugs, book covers and countless yays, for all the milestones you've stumbled over.

Push ... but too hard. Plug ... but not too deep. Yell ... but too loud. Share ... but too much. These are the rules that we live with as authors. We must refrain from revealing too much of who we are and just enough to keep us accessible. It often feels like I'm juggling with four balls and a razor blade. One incorrect move and there is going to be blood.

Now, that's not to say I don't. The inadequacy, awkwardness and the apologetic blanket that encompasses me, because I feel I'm inconveniencing everyone—does not deter. Rather, it fuels. I take the energy from these uncomfortable emotions and I apply them to my ongoing drive to become the author I wish to be. Most days, I must admit, leave me breathless with exhaustion from a journey up hill. But for the times when I see that shimmering light and I reach out and actually grab hold, the reason is clear. I love what I do. And the alternative to that is far worse then any marketing monster I must slay.